Vishal on Feeling Free

This story follows yesterday's post from Dominatrix Mistress Domina Vontana. 

"I'm 22 and was born in Arlington, Virginia. My family is Indian and Anavil Brahmin, the highest caste. All my life, I was raised by women -- my Mom and two older sisters -- as my Dad was always at work. I think that girls always telling me what to do is where my submissiveness comes from.

"My parents never had that sex conversation with me, so I had to figure it out on my own. Ever since I was little, I remember being into BDSM. In elementary school, I had this dream about two girls tying me up. When I was older, I would play cops and robbers and tie people up. Later on, I started surfing the internet a lot and came across BDSM stuff. I would find rope in the house and tie myself up. My parents saw some of the websites I was checking out and found rope in my bedroom. They had my brother-in-law talk with me once. I told him that I was just experimenting and to leave me alone. Look, my family knows that I'm a kinkster, but there are some things that you don't talk about in an Indian family, and this is definitely one of them.

"When I got older and started having vanilla sex, it satisfied me, but I was still thinking about being spanked, tied up, or whipped. I started pursuing BDSM in October when I finally had the money to come and do sessions with a Dominatrix. I was scared that it might be a sting operation, but it turned out to be totally legit. I remember going to a chat room before I went to ask about dress code and things like that. Someone wrote back saying, 'Don't worry, you're not going to be wearing anything!'

"For me, things really clicked when I met Domina Vontana. She said I could do better by serving her than by paying her. Now, I help clean her house, build her website, shovel snow, give her rides, whatever she needs. It is really fulfilling and helps out with my anxiety. It is a total power exchange. I give her myself completely during scenes and as a lifestyle. Nothing that I have done with her has been sexual; it is all discipline. We have more of a mother-son relationship than anything else. She constantly praises me and makes me feel good. In turns out that this is the best therapy I have ever had.

"Now, as a submissive, I am under a consideration period where we get to know each other. There are a few more stages between being a submissive and being a slave. Mistress says that I am on the right track to getting there, though. As I pursue my own relationships, these experiences make me realize that I need to find a partner who has a dominant personality. At the same time, I need to keep a separate relationship with my Mistress to maintain my discipline and kinkster needs. I will definitely have to tell my partner about my Dominatrix, and they will need to meet. If the person is open-minded, I am sure it will be okay because Mistress is the kindest person that I know. Being with her makes me a better, more proactive person. Now I know that I want to be powerful in the business world, but, outside of that, I don't mind being submissive. It makes me feel free."

Mistress Domina Vontana on Power Exchange

"I am a preacher's daughter from Whitefish, Montana. I grew up in barns, and we would go out on stampedes and round up the young bulls in the spring and castrate them. I saw the force of life from a very young age and was taught not to flinch. Education was a huge emphasis in my family, and there was always that push to seek knowledge. I definitely credit the area where I grew up for a lot of the qualities that now make me a Dominatrix, like hard work, education, and loyalty.

"When I tried to break into the Dominatrix scene in D.C., no one would give me an opening, which is how I ended up stripping out on the Eastern Shore. During that time, I went out to San Francisco for S&M training and really benefited from the networking. I found people whom I could call when I had questions as a young Dom. Three weeks after my Dad died, I put up an ad on Craigslist as a Dominatrix. One of the major reasons I do this work is because I know that my father was submissive. I know that if he had understood himself, he'd still be here today.

"When people don't accept who they are on whatever level, whether sexual, social or personal, they can do a lot of damage to themselves because of how unhappy they are. I just want every father, mother, daughter, and lover out there to be able to know who they are and honestly communicate that to their partner, whether it is vanilla sex or extreme kink. If someone is coming to me to induce a feeling of shame because they don't feel comfortable with what they desire, they need to seek a psychotherapist, not me. I only want to play with people who are comfortable with their desires and embrace their identity. I screen people using extreme intuition and patterns. When you are in the business long enough, you learn who the wankers are and you can point them out in ten seconds.

"People come to me to do all kinds of scenes that include things like rope bondage, impact play, which is everything from spanking with a hand or a paddle to flogging and hitting, and cross-dressing, which is my bread and butter. There is so much cross-dressing out there. You would have no idea because someone can just wear panties to work under their trousers. I love edge play, which is the scary, psychological stuff when you get inside somebody’s head and play with their fears. It builds up someone’s confidence. As for rope bondage, I was into rope before I knew about this scene. A pile of rope makes me smile. I think it takes me back to my farm days.

"I also do traditional slave play and service. Some people are really fulfilled and satisfied by coming and cleaning my house and knowing that I appreciate them. It sounds a little unbelievable to those that haven't experienced it, but it is very sincere. Now I have one boy who is 27 and Jewish and has served me for two years. I also have my little Indian boy. He is 22 and has been with me for a couple of months now. I would love to find a girl, too.

"Being a preacher’s daughter and a Dominatrix, I can see things that other people can’t see in people, including their power. Power is real, and these people in D.C. pack a lot of it. What these people are giving up to me - their will, their intellects, their bodies, their desires, their pocketbooks - are larger and stronger than anywhere in the world. This is the perfect city for what I do. These are important individuals who have a lot of people that rely on them. They spend all day making heavy decisions. When they come to visit me, my ropes set them free. The smallest consideration for the submissive inside of them is enough to empower them to go out and work hard for another three to four weeks. I'm like a therapist, a life coach, a best friend, a Momma who is gonna tell it to you straight. Generally, if they maintain a professional relationship with me, they are also better husbands and partners when they go home.

"I hope to meet someone and settle down someday, as I was disowned by my family. That person has to be very emotionally secure and intellectually sophisticated. When I am out at a bar, I tell people that I am a consultant who works with the military. But when I'm trying to get to know somebody, I usually put it out there pretty quickly. Occasionally, I have a lover of my own who is not freaked out by what I do for a living. A lot of people think I'm a prostitute. All I want to say is that this is so much work with the equipment, the overhead, the cleaning, the supplies, and the sanitation. If I had wanted to take the easy way, I would have done that a long time ago. I pay thousands of dollars every year to attend seminars, where I build my skills. Give me credit."

Read more about Mistress Domina Vontana here. Learn more about the BDSM community in D.C. from Black Rose and DCTNG.

Charles on the Power Center of the Universe

"I've had bad luck all of my life. First off, I got drafted into the military in 1966 at 19. I was First Infantry Division and stationed all around Vietnam, including Danang. I was ducking bullets, evading land mines and shooting up Vietcong. I got released and went to work at Walter Reed Medical Center as a custodian and then the National Institute of Health. After that, I went to the Veterans Affairs hospital to get cured for depression and post traumatic stress disorder. They put me on Prozac. My doctor was a clinical psychologist and I am still mad at him. That Prozac didn't do me no good. I found other ways to self-medicate, if you know what I mean.

"I've had a hell of a life. The love of my life ducked out on me. She got married to someone else. Baby girl, if you hear this, I am still looking for you, hun. I've had racist judges. All of this has been so hard on me because I am so sensitive.

"See, I am country boy. I grew up in Alabama and went to high school in Washington, D.C. For me, D.C. is the power center of the universe. With all due respect to Chicago, New York and L.A., Washington D.C. is the best. Believe me, it's the truth. I mean, with the Pentagon, the White House, the Capitol Building, the Supreme Court, we got it going on big time! Okay, I feel like I am starting to show off a little bit too much about this city."

Kamel on Free Hugs

"I was born in Algeria and came here twelve years ago when I was twelve. Life here was completely different than Algeria. I lived in Virginia at first. It was just like the movies! But, when I spent more time seeing the inside of life there, I didn't like it. My family moved to Columbia Heights a number of years ago. I like it better here and can do stuff like this - give out free hugs outside the Target. I decided on this location because it is near my house and there is a lot of foot traffic. The diversity here is great, so I can hug all kinds of people.

"I thought that giving out free hugs was a nice way to share the love and interact with strangers. A lot of people go through really hard days and, if I can make their day lighter, I know it will make both of our days brighter. Plus, everybody loves hugs! If you can't express something through words on the street, then expressing something physically is at a whole 'nother level. I have gotten a few negative response, but the positives definitely make up for them. I say one-out-of-ten people come and get a free hug from me. And once someone gets a hug, those watching want free hugs, too. I am pretty good at feeling the other person's energy and responding with the right kind of hug. I also do fist bumps for those that don't want hugs. It's just about the connection.

"From here, I am probably going to expand and give out more hugs around the city. I actually have a couple of friends who are going to get involved. Why wouldn't people want to give and get hugs? It makes you and other people feel good. I also have a sign in Spanish because you have to target the Latin community. You gotta give them the opportunity to get some love, too."

Tyrell aka T Stacks on True Love

"I want to talk about true love man. Love in D.C., it is hard to find a special lady for you. But love, it comes natural in D.C. though. You going to find someone made for you. I found my girl named Jasmine. Met her like three years ago at the club going to a Go Go. Saw TOB. She was popping her ass and shit, I just fell in love with that."